LAWS OF THE UNIVERSE

Humor

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of Probability: The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone: If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

Law of the Bath: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don’t want to be seen with.

Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won’t work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Law of the theatre: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy’s Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down of a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpeting.
Brown’s Law: If the shoe fits, it’s ugly.

Oliver’s Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson’s Law:  As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.